tkd

tkd
1Q84 World. 5/2015

Saturday, March 4, 2017

The days go by on and on with nothing to note. The most I would ever do is swim and work out at the sports club alone. I eat alone, take walks alone, and sleep alone. If someone told me to list the things I've done in the past month or so, it would probably remain blank.

I'd go to work and go straight home. Almost a year goes by since my graduation, and still no company has even an iota of interest in me. It's as if I possessed an air of hatred to them, after "careful" consideration. An employment recruiter spams me with job openings way off my radar. Rejection after rejection. Nothing gives me motivation anymore. Things just don't seem right. My high school reunion is in three months. They're bound to ask my whereabouts these days 99%. Not having anything would be such an embarrassment. In retrospect, fours years just fast-forwarded. College just flew by, like a dream. Four years of struggle, and the best kind of fun I've ever had. Then come graduation, and it dies down, where the real world awaits. Put on your suits, grab your suitcases, cram yourself in a rush hour train, and get yelled at your boss. Rinse and repeat.

"It's gonna take another what? 2 or 3 years for you to find something," someone told me.

At that moment I lost it. I couldn't stand hearing such a thing. I know I'm not that lousy. And I know that somewhere, someone would accept me.

Though I accept that this is only a temporary feeling. I'm having a hard time at the moment. Things will get back on track soon.