2013 reflections

2013 winds down to a close, as I take some moments to look back and see what I've done. 2013 was a long year for me. January 2013 I was still at my previous college stressing out about sending in applications for transferring. The entire process took me about a couple months and finally, acceptance letters came and I decided then that I was officially going to transfer.

And I remember telling my friends. Most of them were indifferent and understood my decision. Telling the taekwondo club was difficult, as I was the president and set a mission statement/goal to transform the curriculum to make it more rigorous and challenging in the hope of sending members to state and local tournaments. It was an opportunity for me to lead the club and revamp it; to improve the club so that all members could undoubtedly say that they started from the bottom and now they are here. But it had to cut short, as I declared to the group that I was going to transfer. The few professors and students that were in the club felt dejected and for some time, seemed as if they lost all hope. As if they longed for summer when it was already winter. Nothing could be done.

So there I was as I packed my belongings on the spring of 2013 when my freshman year was finished. I  took one last look at the campus and never looked back.


Those were the first few months of 2013. Then summer arrived, where I did nothing but take a few driving courses, visit a lot of vintage bookstores to catch my eyes on rare books, work out, and dream.

As fall winded down, I attended the school that I had transferred to and immediately made some friends. Even made a girlfriend which I appreciate from the bottom of my heart and can be considered a life event. Had I didn't transfer I would not have met her. She is a gift that the college brought me.

2013 was a long year but well worth the effort. Onwards to 2014!

Journalism and Ethics

In journalism, ethics is a huge area that most journalists face however tend to give the least concern about. They are in fact trained to get the story and coverage in rather than thinking twice about whether or not it is morally right. Their acts may violate certain laws, privacy rules, and even commit trespass, but in the long run a journalist's job is to get the news in to the public as best as possible. Regardless if the information is not transparent--that is, accurate, verified, and researched from the bare-bones, they aim to inform the public the particular subject matter in a timely fashion. They will do whatever they can to get the facts. For example, one can expect muckracking masqueraders to conceal their identities and pretend to be another person and clandestine smarties to adroitly put a spin on certain information and publish it for the body politic. It takes guts to become a journalist, it seems, as they face ethical situations and tradeoffs most of the time. But one of my personal code of ethics that I forgot to mention on a paper was the fact that a journalist should minimize their inner feelings.

Let's say you see a woman about to commit suicide by jumping from her terrace while holding her baby. Other people gathered around are yelling at her don't do it and expressing how crazy she is while you are there capturing photos of the whole scene.

Obviously one would, from basic human instinct, try to save her and her baby but after all it is important that the journalist pushes aside the sorrow he feels for the woman and do his job by getting the pictures of her plunging to her death and sending them in. Regardless if it may seem wrong, that is what a journalists does. Getting in the news and the hard evidence.

In other words, when you are in a journalist mode, don't be sorry. Just get the news in.

Now of course there are portrayals of these in popular films such as Pollack's 'Absence of Malice', where a heroine journalist fails to express concern for others and decides to publish false, sensitive information that eventually leads a woman to commit suicide. Her acts not only shone a false light on particular individuals but it also lead to suicide.

It just means that journalists face an inestimable number of moral dilemmas each time they are in the process of covering groundbreaking news, and that can sometimes be the toughest aspect, psychologically, to deal with.

Kinship Feelings, From a Sibling-less Kid's Perspective

Many people with siblings constantly bring up the mere idea that their sibling(s), whether older or younger, are, but not limited to being annoying, unintelligent, mean, and abusive. I have heard from various friends that their own siblings can sometimes throw them off and literally grind their gears to the absolute max. Of course there are certain drawbacks that people with siblings face that I feel lucky I do not have to deal with, such as sharing, and getting less attention from family members. If you are, say, the third child in your family, you have to deal with sharing the PS3 with your other two siblings whilst an only child can have it all to his or herself. If you are the middle child, you are sandwiched in, as you are neither the youngest nor the oldest, thus you have the tendency to feel trapped. Let's say you meet your neighbor and your parents introduce you to your two siblings. Generally, they will remember the youngest because he or she is the youngest, and the oldest, because he or she is simply, yes, the oldest. The middle man is a position where you would sometimes feel isolated and forgotten, I think.

As an only child, I do feel that I am much more calm, as there is not really any competition. In fact there is no need for competition. Only childs typically do not need to think about who has a better haircut or wardrobe or who is smarter. We only childs go by our own pace as peaceful as a bird gracefully flapping its wings and soaring through the cloudless sky. 

But then again, there are certain times I feel that I want a sibling. That life would be a tad better with a sibling. Personally I feel I would be more outgoing and aggressive if I had a sibling. Sure I've got friends, but the kinship feeling is not the same. In the long run you are always with your siblings. Family outings, traditions, and rituals, you all celebrate together until eternity. On the other hand, friends are friends; you don't live with them. You can't really have personal family related conversations with your friends. You can, but it's just not the same. I sometimes feel lonely that I am the only child in the family. Sometimes I feel that I am on my own, whereas, if I had a sibling, I might feel that I got a partner; a sidekick that reinforces the idea that I got someone I could always consult whenever I do not feel like talking to mom or dad or anyone else. If your parents got into a fight, you could always spend some time with them, whilst, an only child would just have to deal with the tension usually on their own. 

But being an only child is at the same time a privilege. I was born this way and am proud of it. 

Secret santa and karaoke with the college friends on a record-breaking 70 degree weather. My girlfriend and I turned out to be each other's secret santa. Who would have thought. Fate or conspiracy? Haha. 

The Paradox of my Experience with Roommates (as of now)

I am on the car on the way back home. I take a moment and reminisce about my seemingly bad luck with roommates so far.

One day I came back to the dorm and I saw my roommate's side of the room completely empty, bare bed with no sheets. Closet with no clothes hanged. Nothing on the desk nor in the drawers. Everything was swept and washed away. All that was left was a half-drunken Sprite bottle, an opened combo pack of instant spicy ramen noodles, and a bunch of his littered trash.

Now why did he leave all of sudden without notifying me? I don't even know whether he dropped out or just left for somewhere. His phone number is unreachable. There could be many reasons. Initially, I thought what in the world is he thinking? But the more I thought about it, the more I figured that it was also partially my fault.

Although he is an international student from China, which means he can only grasp basic conversational English, I could have made him feel more comfortable by talking to him more. Most of the time I would come back to the dorm and read or surf online with little to no conversations. Other times I'd crash into my girlfriend's place on campus for the night.

"Put yourself in his shoes," someone said. "Imagine you were an international student in, say, Russia. How would you feel if your roommate never gave the effort to talk to you and just left you there in your dorm?"

Sure I've had a few meals with him earlier in the semester, and we talked about some English slang and what our plans were for the weekend. The other time we had a conversation about what kind of video games we played. And that was the most we've talked and other days until now it was as if the room was muted.

But is it right for him to just not tell me and leave all of a sudden? With all that trash scattered everywhere?

From the start based on our greetings and introductions, I knew that this person was not as comfortable based on his weak hand shake grip and his hunched back.

If he turns out to not return for the spring semester I have yet to have a roommate for the full academic year. My roommate from last year decided to transfer to another college in the fall. He was obsessed with mermaids and had the nagging urge to leave on 'Friends' on full volume as he sleeps. Thus, sleepless nights were common for me back then. I got a new roommate the following spring and he turned out to be a huge pothead who gave the littlest attention to hygiene. First day rooming with him and he got me involved with the university police. Apparently he was a notorious student on campus.

I just want to room with a person with common decency, preferably one who I know, and not get randomly put with ones who are just peculiar and odd. Of course I am not expecting much but the roommates I have had in the past are just way too odd for me to handle.

No need to make a snow angel because you are already an angel to me. 

That point where I am about to take my last final. That point where I am still trying to craft my schedule  and classes for next spring. That point where I am supposed to be studying for this last final. 

After this final comes packing. Then laundry. 

The struggle. Haha