Never in a while have I been so insecure about something that is so incredibly normal for others. Never in a while have I vacillated for more than a few weeks. Never in a while have I been hesitant of something that I am already used to. So what's holding you back? As one would say. Although traveling internationally alone can be challenging at first, what's the challenging part if you are already used to going there with your parents? They would continue.
Now don't get me wrong here, I could go if I was forced to. In fact I could just go right off the bat. But something's holding me back. It might be the sudden transition of going from parents to alone, my nonnative Japanese tongue, or just being on a plane for 13 hours.
True, all of these nonsense concerns are just irrelevant. My mom, her friends, and my friends tell me, you're almost freaking 17 years old, you should be able to travel alone; Japanese people want to speak more English than Japanese, y'know! They understand even if you speak to them in English! In fact they would envy you for speaking to them in English! It's the chief lingua franca of the world; You're already used to being on a plane for 13 hours! You once slept for 13 hours!
So I guess I have no other excuses to blurt out. They've all been counter-argued successfully. But hey, what about the frequent earthquakes and the radiation hazards? And the fact that electricity is short, not much A/C and mosquitoes stinging your skin every second? But those aren't respectable excuses. Look at all of the citizenry in Japan! They live there, with outstanding stoicism and patience. Look at me here making concerns when I'm not even in that country.
It's not like I don't want to go to Japan; I actually do. In fact I'm positive that I would have a blast there, meeting my family that I haven't seen in quite a while; possibly meeting my childhood friend that I haven't met for more than I could remember; feasting on a wide array of traditional Japanese food; taking a refreshing bike ride along the neighborhood-- a thing I could barely experience here in the city; engaging in the Japanese culture; taking a bath; hearing that incredibly soothing female voice in the train, in the department stores, among others; buying sodas from those super cool vending machines; and urinating in those tech-savvy toilets that automatically washes your you-know-what after you finish number 2.
But I guess it's the process that troubles me before I get there. But again, these concerns are so weak that a majority of them would just say, "pshh". Just get your departure ticket, board the plane, and tadaa! You're here! There's nothing else you have to worry about! Your family's picking you up at the airport too! You barely have to work! They would say.
But it's not that. It's something else that's worrying me. I feel like they are just generalizing-- not focusing on the specifics. Rolling my portmanteau by myself at the airport is another feeling, making sure I don't miss my flight is another, the awkwardness of sitting next to a stranger in the plane for 13 hours is, in no doubt, another, especially if it's a two seater. But I'm just worrying too much, I guess. What's there to worry when I've gone to Japan with my parents for as long as I could remember? Let's see, I have a few days to consider.
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