How much are you going to miss me?

On a chilly, winter evening she and I walked along Chinatown, taking in the bitter breeze seeping through  us. While holding hands with our hands in her right coat pocket, we aimlessly took a stroll through the busy streets. A mix of English and Chinese spoken here and there from the passersby. Drivers honked, infuriated by the unnecessary creation of traffic on the road. A man leisurely was smoking his cigarette, the smoke silently billowing up in the air. A flock of birds flew around the sky in a circular motion, whimsically exploring the freedom of being above ground. Despite the freezing temperatures these past few days, teenagers were playing basketball at the courts, and the kitchen staff with nothing but t-shirts had a cigarette and chatted with each other in their own distinct dialect. The constant drilling from the construction a few blocks away echoed the entire town unpleasantly. Meanwhile here we were, she and I, just the two of us together, peacefully in our own little world, strutting down the street in love yet at the same time, saddened by the fact that we could not see each other for a while.


"How much are you gonna miss me?" she asked.
"I can say the word 'so' so many times," I said. "As many as the windows up there in that apartment building."
"Well I can say it as many as the stars in the sky," she said.
"Now that was good."
We shared laughs.

In order to fight the bitter cold and take a breather, we stopped by a bakery and munched on some snacks. Among us were a long line of locals buying bread and cake of all sorts. Undifferentiated chatter. English was not even heard. We grabbed a seat, but the cold air found its way to scurry in from the doors. Hoping to keep her warm, I put my arm around her and sat tightly next to her to try to block the cold wind. If only it worked.

The sun descended as the time flew miraculously, and evening arrived. Time seemed to go by faster when you were with people you really love. We made our way to the train station and we embraced each other as it was about time that she had to go. I was to head back home. We kissed, hugged, and stared into each other's eyes. Letting go of her hand almost made me shed a tear. As I entered the turnstile to the subway I walked towards the station platform. I looked behind at her and waved as I walked ahead. The more I walked ahead, the more I couldn't see her. How could I walk away from my baby like that? When I got to the end of the path and looked back once more I couldn't see her. She got mixed with the crowd.

 I was sitting on the train, listening to the monotonous clattering of the tracks hitting the wheels. With a sigh, I stared at the empty seat in front of me.

_____

The grip of her hand touching mine, her soft lips, her beautiful little smile, her eyes, her everything all come to me as I write this at home, alone, missing her being with me. I look at the palms of my hands, imagining her holding them.

That night I looked up in the sky, fixating my eyes on the infinite number of stars scattered above.

Love till infinity.