I try to spend every day of my summer productively. It's already the last day of July, and before I know it August makes its way and school resumes. 

At this point in the summer I'm trying to make the best of each day. No more lazy days where I just stay at home and nap. Although it's still necessary from time to time, I need to do something. I can't spend the rest of my summer to waste. 

Went to go get dragon fruit with B for the first time and it tasted as sweet as kiwi, and you peeled it like a banana. When I peeled it the inside color resembled an exotic pink. The entire fruit was exotic, like a Venus flytrap or some prehistoric organism. It seemed out of place, as if it didn't belong in this world. Hence the name, dragon fruit. All the while B seemed uninterested in the fruit because she's had it for her entire life. Meh-nothing-special kind of emotion. Meanwhile she showed me her daycare kids through her phone. "It's fun going to work now," she said.

We then got fish balls and then proceeded to get sponge cake. In the end we got legit Szechuan as we both struggled with the spicyness of the sliced potatoes and peppers. Our faces turned red as an apple. Meanwhile the speakers played aloud the same classic Chinese song on repeat, on and on.

B at the time was not fond of the way I dressed, more specifically the sleeveless hoodie. You don't need it, she thought. It was breezy today and I thought it would be a good compliment to my outfit of the day. But it didn't. She in fact took it off and brought it upstairs to her home. The weather was in fact chilly. It felt like early fall weather, where a light hoodie would be perfect. 

After dinner we walked to a nearby playground and sat on the bench. The sky grew darker and was submerged in cobalt blue yet kids were still congregating around the handball courts and playing basketball. I was chewing the contents of the rest of the coconut spongecake that she couldn't finish. She was silent for a while, gazing at something way beyond her view. Her graceful, smooth hair fluttered with the wind. She was taking in the sounds of the playground. And at an impulse, an air of nostalgia struck her. 

"Memories," she said. 

She told me that she used to come here often when she was younger. At the time it was getting a bit chilly and I thought it would be nice to wear my sleeveless hoodie. 

But she brought it upstairs. 

haha. 

Woke up this morning and read that B ran a full 13 minutes. I'm so prouddd.

Practiced playing and singing Lennon's Imagine and it shortly started to rain on a seemingly sunny afternoon.

B and I finally had dinner around my neighborhood but she didn't seem to enjoy it thoroughly.

"I think it's good," I said.
She chewed the chicken, studying it. "No but the chicken itself. You have to try the Szechuan in Chinatown."

I guess it wasn't  the greatest according to B, but I personally savored the taste. We went down on a little stroll as I told her the noteworthy stores and eateries around town.

"B do you want ice cream?"
"Nope."
"B do you want cream puffs?"
"Nope, but do youuu?"
"I'm actually full."

"I wanna sit," she said.
I had in mind of the park benches but it was too dirty and homeless men were congregating the area.
"McDonald's."
"It's too oily in there."

It was a fun, little date with B. The way she walks, her cute outfit and smile and face and laugh. She was wearing the necklace I gave her back in Valentine's Day and it brought me back.

"Zone out and maintain."

I happened to have a lot of energy today, possibly from the coffee I consumed an hour before, and ran a total of 4.5 miles.

Zone out and maintain.

Earlier today I went to the Yankee game with mom, and they won 2-3. We always have a chill time and it never gets old. We are probably the only mother-and-son pair that goes to games as frequently as us. And that is what we do.

私たち水入らずで過ごすのはここで、本当に、終わりか？

たくさんな思い出がつくられた。

とてもすばらしかった。

すぐには忘れない事さ。

幸せでした。

私たち、最後まで愛してた。

ありがとう。本当に、ありがとう。

全部、夢みたいだ。

難しい。決まらない。

It was a nice last day at my Japanese class. Ended on a good note.


I hope B everything is alright with B. Whatever she is thinking about, I hope it's not anything serious. All I know is that it's about her.

slieurghjskasdf!!

Had another Japanese class today, and it's fun. It's a way to relax and chill. I laugh, the students laugh, and the instructor laughs. When I took Japanese in college, the classes, sometimes, for me, served as a coffee-break-like chill session. A stress-free period, where I could crack a few jokes at certain times and make the instructor and the students laugh. Even here, I feel that. Whenever the students were totally stumped on how to say a word in Japanese or were completely clueless, the instructor would point at me and ask me to blurt out the answer. For me it's all about reviewing and reinforcing what I already know. I learn some new words from time to time, and it's a good way for me to brush up on the language.

I feel like I already said the same exact phrase last time. Anyway,

As usual, my classmate and I had lunch together, at the same convenience store. This time the conversation ranged from Pokemon to Japanese culture. 

"You know Pokemon is racist?"

"Hunh?" I took a bite of my yakisoba. 

"The Pokemon, Jynx. How its body is shaped and its dark skin tone," he said, unwrapping a Chinese-style onigiri he brought from home. "And how it goes inside the Pokeball, which represents slavery."

I blankly stared at him for a few seconds, chewing. "How do people think of that stuff? It's a freaking Pokemon for god sakes."

He laughed. "I know, why!" 

But the more I thought about it, the pokemon did seem to show a hint of racism towards african americans. Below is a picture. 

This chemistry major in fact knew a lot of gaming facts. He told me there was a certain tune called the Lavender Town Tune from the game that made gamers around the age of 7-12, commit suicide. The tune had a certain frequency that made children lose their minds, reportedly. 

Anyway enough of that. 

He was fortunate enough to be accepted to a program where young professionals have the opportunity to travel to Japan to teach English to students. Only a selected few are accepted, and the admission rate is very competitive. He was one of the few to be chosen. Altogether the application process takes about a year. This year he will be teaching in Kagoshima, the southern area of Japan. This is definitely something I've wanted to do. But of course, it requires a bachelor's. It's something to consider over the years. 

He asked me for some advice.

"So how do you approach Japanese people?" he asked me. 

"What do you mean? We are humans too you know."

"Like I heard they were shy and... really serious."

I took a swig of my tea. "I can see that, and it is true, for the most part I guess. It's a cultural thing, based on my knowledge. Being polite is really important over there, especially when talking to elders. That's when these overwhelming honorific verbs come into play. But leaving that all aside, if you tell them that you know English, you will lure them in."

"Really? What about girls?"he asked.

"Sure. Because they want to know English. They think it's so cool, kind of like how Americans get intrigued by certain kanji or Chinese characters. You'd find a lot of pseudo English written everywhere in Japan. And, in America, a lot of people with tattoos of Chinese characters missing a stroke or two." 

He nodded, intently thinking about something.

When class ended I didn't know if I had time to meet B, who was, at the time, going to Coney with her friends. But she had time, so I immediately got on board the subway and headed downtown. 

"Where are you?" I was at the meetup spot already waiting for her.

"We're almost there," she said. "Ughh my stomach."

"I can meet you wherever you are."

"No it's okay."

Cars passed, and I stared at the passersby and their shoes and outfits for no reason at all. I was on the phone the entire time with her while waiting, and I realized that I sounded absolutely exhausted. 

About fifteen minutes later, we met, at long last. Her friends were tagging along with her, seeming nervous as ever around me. They kept their Cantonese flow going with each other, leaving me lost in translation. There's a nagging urge to know what they're saying, even if it's nothing important. I'd have to ask B in order to know what's going on. Otherwise, I would be totally lost and would have to guess my way through every situation. It's always best to speak a language that everyone can understand, so everyone involved knows what's going on and is comfortable. You'd kind of feel left out if something like jlkajsdhfauskdjhfaskdjfha came out of nowhere. 

"asjdhfalkjsdhfaeifjkadsf," he laughed. 

"ajskhdfakjsdhfaiuwefhjksjdfhaskdjfha."

"kljasdkj," she said. "fjskeiekdjgh!??"

"kajsdklahsdjlhw!!!!"

They all laughed. So I followed suit. 

But of course I respect all languages and everybody's comfort zones. But it's just something that always gets me. After all we live in a fabulous world filled with a diversity of dialects. 

They eventually called Coney quits because they got tired, especially B. I escorted her home, unable to find the right time to leave. I hugged and kissed her as I took one step inside the entrance of her building. It was the closest I got to her home. 

When I went home, I pondered what to get for dinner. B was tired so I understood how she wanted to rest at home. There's that sense of incompleteness when I didn't have dinner with B. It was like using a pencil without an eraser attached to the top. Dinner with B was so pleasing that without it, the day kind of felt off. But I'm all in smiles because I know that I will see her very very soon. Because baby, it's you. Sha la la la la la la

note to self of class

30 min, pad sparring. Rotate every 2 min.

water break.

rest of class (30 min), pad drills (10 on each side)

- fast kick, turning kick
- turning kick, double kick, switch, double kick
- distance kicks
- skipping axe, same leg mid-section turning kick, high.
- spinning hook kick

July 14, 2014

Had a tremendous, magical, surreal 20th birthday. It all happened perfectly all in the right time. It's as if I was following an imaginary schedule.

The first half of my day was spent in boredom, at jury duty. I felt like the youngest person there. At one point I felt as if I was a passenger in a long haul flight. At another I felt as if I was being manipulated like in 1984 after watching the trial introduction video on the two television monitors that were hanged on the corner. And, at another point I felt like I was in the Hunger Games when they called out the names.

I could say it again. It's a really boring place to be. I finished reading a Chandler book and roaming around the internet. Jurors were reading the newspaper and or a book. A few were just blankly staring into space, and some were even sleeping.

A couple hours passed and before I knew it I was set free.

Then I happened to bump into my friend, who also had jury duty at the time. He was on break while I was free.
"You're so lucky," he said. "Let's meet now. I got some time to kill."
Whereupon we met and had some Subway sandwiches for a quick lunch. We talked about how to not get selected as the twelve jurors, and how there should be six rounds in taekwondo sparring rather than three. He didn't know that it was my birthday and I didn't feel the need to tell him.
"I'm good with three," I said.
"But think about how much more exciting it would be if there were six."


Then he went back to his jury duty and then I finally was able to meet B. I walked with her to the bakery where she picked up a cake. The weather was scorching hot and humid that we couldn't even hold hands.

"I want a tattoo of the sun and the yin-yang," she said.
I nodded.
"The sun has so many meanings. I want to shine and provide joy and brightness to others, just like the sun," she said. "And the yin-yang is important because it shows balance."
I nodded. "That's nice." It was truly a wonderful reason.

I didn't know what to expect when she told me to not enter. It took a while. I went to the bathroom, took a few swinging practices with the plastic baseball bat, and stared out the window. A while later she called me in. And then immediately I began to see about thirty bright candles scattered on the floor of my room. When I looked closely they were formed in the shape of a heart. She was there, holding her phone recording the moment where I was awestruck and touched and surprised in every sense of the word. She was also holding the cake with the two candles. She began to sing happy birthday.

"Wow," I held my hand against my heart. It was a really surreal moment, like I was dreaming.

Inevitably a tear streamed down my eye. I've celebrated my birthday throughout the years but nothing as grand as this.

We then blew out the candles in the heart shape and she showed me a video that she created. It was a video of friends from college wishing me a happy birthday, one by one. She made me realize that I wasn't always alone, and even if I was, those people would be there. It was touching and beautiful. The video that she created re-connected me to those people and gave me the opportunity to tie a closer bond with them. It's truly amazing.

Then she gave me two cards, one for our 9 months, and the other for my birthday. The words were spectacular and made me shed another tear. While wiping it off, she brought me the birthday gift, which was a miniature baseball bat with our names and a message engraved on it. I was extremely happy and touched. Thank you so much B.

In the evening my mom and I celebrated with some lobster and paella. It was great and filled my stomach up good.


But then again all of these things I've done today I've never done or experienced in my life before. From jury duty to Bs gifts and tremendous surprise. I have turned 20, and have attained the melancholy brilliance of the moon, as Fitzgerald suggests, and it was a wonderful one. Thank you alll!!

My Japanese school classmate and I were at lunch break, munching on some stand-up pizza. He recently graduated from college with a degree in chemistry. He was the captain of his handball team and as of now he's taking a break from hardcore collegiate academics and taking Japanese classes.

"One thing I would advise you is to really consider studying abroad."

He studied in China for about a month and told me how only .2% of the students now study abroad. It's a declining rate. That was the only time he experienced the dorm life.

"So in your dorm did you have to share bathrooms?" he asked.
"Yup. It's a community bathroom. It sucked because nobody knew how to clean up for themselves."
He laughed. "I never want to dorm."

I then told him how I was a black belt and he began to become enthusiastic and envious.

"Can you show me some kicks?" he asked. "Do you know a 540?"

He spent a few years in high school practicing taekwondo, but it was the kind of dojang that just wanted money rather than considering the efforts of each student.

"It's like buying a black belt rather than earning it," he said. And in fact he was right. A lot of martial arts schools handle their business that way. In a selfish, greedy manner, trying to win over clientele. I am fortunate to train at a school that emphasizes on effort and, as one of my masters said it, "demand excellence".

There were only four students in the entire class, and we were partners for exercises. Most of the lessons I already knew beforehand, but it was a good way for me to review and reinforce my knowledge of the language.

Anyways tomorrow I gotta wake up first thing in the morning for jury duty.

Went to the local Halal food cart stand that I had yet to try near my block. I wasn't expecting the greatest but I gave it a shot for a lunch. I sat down at the park and munched away. At the time I wished I could rewind back time and refrain myself from eating it. The chicken was too watery, soft and tasted like lamb. The ranch sauce was terribly bland and the entire chicken over rice was utterly unappetizing. I washed the aftertaste with pepsi. The best halal is, and always will be, the Halal Guys.

With my scooter I cruised around the park, through the path and on the road. I've been maneuvering this two wheeler for years that it was like second nature to me. I didn't need to use both hands (just one), could swish through pedestrians and narrow pathways and zoom down hills. Okay, if there were rolling hills like the one's in San Francisco, I'll reconsider that. Whenever I cruised in a road with a lot of pedestrians I'd slow down and hold down the fender and the handle brake. I aimed to be as less distracting to the flow of the road as possible, like a driver.

Without much to do, Fridays didn't seem so rewarding. Everyday seemed like a Friday to me recently that the actual Friday did not mean anything at all. And that was a really unfortunate feeling. I mean, sometimes it's alright to have some relaxation but in my case it was kind of getting old. I needed some productivity, aside from exercising and reading and writing. I wanted to work in an office whether it be journalism or PR or anything and experience the working world, get some cash, and feel how a Friday really feels like during the summer.

curry with a pair of shoes on top

I happened to arrive about fifteen minutes late to our meetup spot.

"No hat, hunh?" she said.

We walked our way to find a new pair of shoes for her, and made our way to Go Go Curry. Time for another Yelp-like review. Jeez, at this point I should just make an account. But anyways, the interior was cozy and small, with only two small tables and a bar. It was around dinnertime yet there was only one customer who had just finished his large-sized curry. There was only one employee, and he took care of the register and making the curry. All the while the Go Go Curry Japanese program was playing on the television, it seemed. The katsu curry, which comes on a tin plate, was decent, and the flavor was just right. I added some rakkyo to mine to boost the flavor. The curry itself is dark, not one of those light kinds. Overall it's a nice place for a quick lunch or dinner.

Once B finished her's she seemed to enjoy it fully. Sayonara! She said to the employee who was, based on my perceptions, not Japanese.

We walked aimlessly around the town, making pit stops at benches to rest every now and then. The way B walked was so adorable. I imagined each step she made making cute sounds. Bip Bop Bip!

Shortly an asian man, around his late twenties, walked across from us.

"B you would look so nice if you wore that," she said.
He was wearing slim, blue cropped pants with a white t-shirt and a small, black bookbag.
"Cropped pants?" I said.
"Yeaaa. That look is nice. Because you have the shoulders and everything."

At that time I reconsidered my outfit of the day. A muscle-fit yellow Hollister polo with some checkered pants. Before heading out I thought it was a decent, alright look, but the more I walked with the look, it seemed kind of off. Would a college student still wear those Hollister tees? I bet most have transitioned to Abercrombie at least, or something of that sort. But it's also important to not compare with others in how you dress. Just because this guy is wearing it doesn't mean you have to too. Peer pressure should not come into play with clothing. Have some pride, some originality. Don't sag your pants and jump on the bandwagon just because the millennial generation thinks it's hype. You don't have to do that in order to be cool. Keep your own style and be proud and embrace it. That's how I thought about it.

While sipping soymilk and eating some nori maki arare rice crackers, Bs feet starting to hurt again. Hopefully they aren't from her new shoes. All shoes are uncomfortable at first so it's normal to feel right for your feet at first. I suggested her to massage her legs and apply some cooling lotion, preferably some aloe gel or something to soothe the pain down.

Sports talk

The Brazil vs. Germany game was simply astonishing and shocking and unbelievable. I was speechless when I saw the goals. Without Silva and Neymar, the team seemed to lose their flow. The host country suffered a huge loss, 7-1. 

It's also sad to hear Soriano designated for assignment. He's such a star player for the Yankees and always will be. 

Djokovic won the Wimbledon. Wanted Federer to claim the trophy, but what happened happened. 

Bicycle, and all that jazz

Such a wonderful day today with B. It was nearly only the two of us biking as we cycled our way around the path while taking in the unobstructed scenery of Lady Liberty and the financial district adjacent to it. The Staten Island Ferry was sailing across the river, and seagulls were soaring through the air. I felt as if we owned the island. The last time I was on a bike was in Japan, about three years ago. I finally had the chance to ride it and an air of nostalgia hit me when I rung the bike bell.

Chiring Chiring!!

There were many times where it was only us two, cycling peacefully while feeling the breeze, all the while B adorably singing aloud Let it Go and the Beatles' Baby it's You. I taught her how to make a sharp turn on a bicycle. Although I haven't ridden one in years, my body was easily able to adapt to it. In Japan I remember casually cycling around the neighborhood that was surrounded by a field of plants and crops and grasses as far as the eye could see. I'd go downhill through a narrow road, and drift with my cousin. Bike drifting. Yeah, that's what it was called.

It was a whole another experience cycling with B and a tremendously lovely one. I'd look back at her, and see her smiling. "I'm coming for youuu," she said.

We crashed into a Dunkin' Donuts shortly and I sipped down the entire medium iced coffee while B wasn't even halfway done with her small size. Then we ate some healthy dinner nearby.

Such great adventures with B.

I met my friend from my previous college and he was all the same. Wearing the same, black tee from last year. He stands tall, about 6'2, with a booming voice that could be heard miles away. Standing, he would tower over me. We talked about what previous suitemates who haven't seen each other for a year would talk about. Do you still see that guy around campus? How's life over there? and all of that. Under the hot summer sun, we ate Chipotle for lunch and played arcade games nearby. Skeeball, Colorama and all the games that made us feel nostalgic of childhood. 

Last year we ate Chipotle at the same place, and I managed to take a picture today and compare it from last year. I guess the only stark difference are the glasses. 

There was really no highlight for the day as we just chilled on the benches just taking in the summer sun and the bright and tall skyscrapers around us. 

"So any crazy college stories?" he asked, seeming bored. 

I thought about one real hard. And the one that I remembered vividly was the time a friend threw her birthday party in her dorm. There were about five girls, and two guys. All of the girls took shots, except for B, and they threw a little party blasting out kpop songs, then, about thirty minutes in, they started to get dizzy and drunk; some even yelled out nonsense, calling people's names. Another kept stumbling and we had to support her to keep her up. Another was drooling saliva and we had to use a tissue to clean it up. Long story short. They all threw up. So B and I, along with the other guy, all had to clean it up. It wasn't somewhere you wanted to be. 

"Well, I'm going to stop eating," he said.
"Didn't mean to bring it up at this time," I laughed. 
"No it's all good." 


In the end I took him to a 1$ pizza joint and the slices tasted like plastic. Never will I ever set foot there again. I don't know how there are good reviews there, but it's just not at all great. After I went to a Starbuck's and the name that they wrote down spelled,

Shai. 

Way off. 

Happy Fourth.

Staying in for the fireworks tonight. Windy day today, probably because of Arthur, the hurricane. Two storms in a row.

The days are going, with not a thing in my agenda but meeting up with B and a few friends. Haven't met up with a single high school classmate in two years. Finding a job at this point is likely to not happen, unless I pull out a miracle and stumble upon one to my liking.

Last year around this day if I remember exactly I went to the beach with my tkd training partners and friends. This year I still have yet to go.


"All of my friends are getting a car," she said. "And some of them don't even have their license yet."
I was stunned.
"How?"
"Their parents thought they needed it."
"But how do they deal with the payments and maintenance?" I said. "You're thrown with so much responsibility."
"I guess their parents."

I too wish I had one but that's nearly impossible currently. Transportation here is everywhere and cars are unneeded. And there's just too much maintenance and payments involved for now. But I hope very soon I will get to rent a car and drive places.

I imagined myself in a convertible cruising around Oahu, Hawaii, on my way to Haleiwa. Shades on, I feel the breeze hitting against my skin and smell the soothing scent of the sapphire blue ocean while looking out at the pleasing, postcard-like scenery. I'd take a gander at the Chinaman's Hat Island, and take a rest somewhere. I would lean against the convertible and chug down a beer, looking down watching the waves.

Damn, how much I want a car.

We got out of the station and it was pouring rain with lightning on the side. We both got wet immediately. The back of my shirt was soaked and our shoes were drenched with water. Surprisingly a couple of people were still playing soccer at the field. A roar of thunder vibrated the sky. Pedestrians were running and searching for the nearest shelter with a roof or canopy. There was no hint of the sun. It's one of those summer nights.

"I didn't know it was going to rain," she said, grasping the umbrella.
"I heard rumors," I said. "But never knew that it was going to be this severe."

I held on to her arm as we resumed speed-walking to the ramen joint for dinner. Meanwhile we avoided an obstacle including puddles and even a flattened dead bird on the road.

Now let's switch gears here as I will give a Yelp-like review.

The ramen was alright, mediocre. A decent amount of noodles, soup alright. Atmosphere nothing special yet noticeable with its traditional Japanese interior decoration. The clientele were mostly American dudes who seemed to be fond of Japanese anime. Not a spec of Japanese customers or workers. The waitress was Chinese with a nice sense of humor. She placed the check in front of me instead of the center of the table with a little smile and some Chinese that I didn't comprehend but was able to guess somehow: that I had to pay the check. There was nothing especially terrible about this place. I guess it would be a three star out of five.

Then B took me to a dessert place, and I had a mix of lychee, mango, kiwi, and an unknown fruit from Thai that I never had before.

Overall it was a gucci day with BB as always. There is always that time where I don't wanna say bye to her when I'm at her door.

So I waited for her while she was struggling to open the front door with her new keys. It takes a while, she said. Then she finally opened it and before I knew it she closed the door. haha.

Driver's license!!!

July 1,

The day I got my driver's license!!!! Starting the month off with an accomplishment. Extremely happy. At long last, I've attained it!!! With zero points deducted. It's been a year and after going through all conflicts with the driving school, I finally got it. Thanks to Skyler, who drove me to the test site and being so chill blasting out rap music; Mr. Watanabe, who taught me some of the rules of the road from a different perspective; Brandon, for teaching most of the lessons; B for cheering me on and giving me motivation (love you BB muah); and mom for all the help with the school and encouraging me to get my license. One of my goals for the summer has been complete!!

Violin, two years later.

A sudden thought came to me after listening to hours of Beatles songs.

Maybe I actually should start to break out my violin again and start playing.

My mom and I were having a discussion during dinner about what I was going to do this summer. We both kind of already knew that finding a job at this point was nearly impossible. But we both agreed that I needed to learn something this summer, whether it be brushing up on my Japanese by searching up classes or anything really. And that's when I thought I should start to play the violin again. I mean, I played for the entire four years of high school, and it seemed like a waste to just end there.

I think my unconscious is also encouraging me to play. Both of the stories I've written somehow involve violins among other instruments in the strings family.

I was the second violinist for most of my high school's orchestra, and it seemed like quitting was the worst thing I could do. And it's so nice to be able to play an instrument.

So it's about time that I bring out the violin that is hidden in my closet and produce the sound from scratch. It's the best time to do that anyways.